Friday Thoughts
Hey friends! How are you?? Like really, HOW ARE YOU?
It’s been a wild summer – much busier than I normally like things. #homebody And it’s been terribly hot. #whiner
This Idahoan is trying not to complain too much, but I’d love it if the 105+ temps stayed down south a bit. It felt like a good time to pop in with a Friday Thoughts post. Nothing too earth-shattering to share, just a lot of random thoughts as usual.
Be sure to chime in down below in the comments!
{This picture pretty sums up my coping skills right now – hanging out in the pasture with the miniature donkeys whilst snarfing down Trader Joe’s mini ice cream cones and avoiding real life and my children #notsorry}
1) Catch Up: Many of you have been here for over a decade. Others are newer friends. But I can easily say I have never been so inundated with kind, heartfelt, thoughtful messages of support and love as I have in the last six months. I always knew I had the best blog readers on the planet, but you have solidified that this year. Thank you for your incredible compassion as I shared some feelings after losing my friend, Holli.
So many of you have reached out with your own stories about grief and loss. You’ve sent cards, flowers, resources and books – and you’ve prayed for me and for Holli’s family. We’ve felt those prayers. Things aren’t easy (especially for Holli’s sweet loved ones), but life has a way of moving forward, and I’m grateful for your patience, support, and understanding.
Other factors, personally, have also felt particularly challenging this year. I think I’m the lone wolf that would gladly take 2020 back over 2021. Ha. I feel like I’ve been stretched beyond my capacity to be stretched in the last 6-9 months. Like: ok, got it! Learning lessons! Taking notes! Making changes! Can we stop now?? K, thanks. I’M DONE.
But. In a weird way, it’s just been in the last couple of weeks that I’ve actually begun to feel grateful for these mental, emotional, and spiritual challenges. They have deepened my empathy and compassion in many areas. I feel like my soul has expanded and my viewpoint has opened up widely. And I realized recently, rather abruptly, that I’m not the same person I was a year ago.
If I could sum it up in a sentence: these intense feelings and challenges I’ve had to face head on have stripped away so many of the unnecessary thoughts and beliefs I used to have and have fine tuned who I really am, what I really believe, who I want to become, and how I want to help my kids through similar situations and trials.
Anyway. I know that’s deep, and I’ve probably lost a couple people with my ramblings already, but…that’s life right now. And I love you guys enough to want to be honest about what real life feels like. I feel weirdly renewed after these epiphanies and ready to tackle the rest of 2021! Kind of. 🙂
On to lighter things!
2) Summer, Summer, Summer: Hi, how’s summer? What’s your summer shaping up to be? A travel summer? A stay-at-home summer? A work summer? A project summer?
Our summer, as mentioned at the top of this post, has been a bit busier than summers of the past.
That’s a good thing, and also an anxiety-inducing thing for homebodies like me.
Brian and my oldest, Jackson, spent 2 1/2 weeks in Belize doing humanitarian work for HEFY. It was everything we hoped it would be and more for Jackson (fun, but also hard and comfort zone pushing). My other kids are now talking about wanting to go and figuring out how to earn money to do so.
We took a trip to Montana to see my parents/family.
Cam and I snuck off to San Diego with my mom for a few days where we experienced the zoo and the beach and also Bobboi gelato (wow!) and ate at La Playa Taco Shop twice because it was so yummy…
…while the boys and Brian headed up to fish in Alaska. A bucket list item that is now checked off for them (proof of which is the 200+ pounds of fish in the freezer). Fish tacos, here we come.
{They had a deep sea charter with Tall Tale Charters and a salmon excursion (via plane and boat) through Alaska West Air. Neither of these are sponsored, but Brian says to tell you he highly, highly recommends both. It was an amazing, once in a lifetime experience for all of them.}
Now we are home and the teenagers are furiously spending the rest of their summer working. A couple full-time and part-time jobs, some lawn mowing and cookie dough selling. Anything and everything to get money in the bank!
3) Speaking Of Money + Teenagers: I feel like I might be opening up a can of worms here, but I’m always curious how other parents manage the whole “we pay for this, you pay for that” thing with kids and teenagers. Our system has ebbed and flowed over the years, but we have settled on a system that works pretty well, even though I always say it’s subject to change at any moment.
Tell me how you make this work in your home and family!
Our super fast version is we do a measly monthly allowance (google tells me I’m super cheap) until they turn 15/16.
In the “I get an allowance” phase of life, they put half of their allowance in savings, 10% to church tithing, and use the rest for their long list of wants. They usually have some type of occasional job like mowing lawns or selling cookie dough or taking care of neighbors’ animals to boost their spending money. In these younger years, we also pay for all of their basic needs like hygiene stuff, school clothes throughout the year and as they grow, etc.
As a side note, we don’t pay our kids for chores or jobs around the house or property. That just comes with the privilege of being part of our family (ha, said with some sarcasm).
Around the age of 15/16 when they can get a full-time job in the summer, allowance is cut off.
In the “I don’t get an allowance any longer” phase of life, the goal is to have a full-time job in the summer. Currently one child is working with a home builder and the other is working at a local ice cream shop. They put half their work earnings in savings, pay 10% to church tithing, and use the rest as spending money + buying many of their own needs (like their favorite hair gel).
This is also when we help them set up a checking account and debit card. As parents, we pay for four main things: car insurance, gas, phone, and a school clothes stipend*.
*a chunk of money they have to budget and use wisely for the school year and resist spending it all on, say, airpods, or else they’ll be wearing shorty shorts and high waters all year – oh wait, that’s actually the style rn
As a side note, several of you recommended the Dave Ramsey course for teens {unsponsored} last year when we were doing school from home, and my two oldest kids went through it. I haven’t read any of Dave Ramsey’s books, and I’m not making a commentary or opinion about his financial philosophies either way, but the teen course was super helpful for my kids. They learned a lot of basic personal finance principles.
Was the course interesting and breathtakingly engaging? Ha. Not really. They thought parts of it were incredibly boring, BUT, they’re still quoting from it a year later. LIVE LIKE NO ONE ELSE, SO THAT YOU CAN LIVE LIKE NO ONE ELSE. 🙂
Anyway, we’re learning as we go. My biggest thing is to make sure we are having a lot of open, honest communication with our kids about the whys and hows of what we’re doing and what our expectations are. No surprises. Just a lot of talking it through. So far everyone seems happy with the arrangement(s). Like I said above, it’s subject to change as we figure out what’s working and what’s not.
Right now my kids have a lot of opportunities to work and a lot of time to just be kids (trust me, they’re bored and they bicker with the best of them!).
I’d love to know how you manage teenagers + money + work in your family/home! Do tell.
4) My Friends: I know some of you aren’t on Instagram, so I wanted to share about some dear friends of ours (I told this story on insta stories last night).
Jared and Lisa are the parents of seven kids and the grandparents of three cute kiddos.
Four years ago, at the age of 50, Jared received the devastating diagnosis of Early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. A diagnosis that shattered his life and his family’s hearts. At the time of his diagnosis, he and Lisa had two sons still in elementary school.
Jared could no longer work; his wife, Lisa, had been supporting the family on a part-time salary while also going to school online to finish her degree. Recently Jared’s health has begun to decline even more rapidly, and Lisa had to quit her job – their only income – so she could be Jared’s full-time caregiver. Lisa and Jared’s families have rallied around them endlessly with time and resources, but they are all living in an unspeakably heartbreaking reality.
Soon after Jared’s diagnosis, he told one of his sons that before he died, he wanted to go on one last family trip to make lasting memories with his wife and kids. His dream has been to take them back to Guatemala where he lived for several years; he fell in love with the country and the people and always wanted to share that with his family.
Because of financial constraints, their family hasn’t been able to take a family vacation all together in years. Last night, I asked if we could make the unimaginable happen for this sweet family?
Could we pull together and raise enough funds to help make Jared’s last wish come true?
You guys. I posted that on insta stories less than 12 hours ago, and your response has brought me to tears – more than once!!
So many of you commented to say you wished you could give more, but all you could manage right now is $1 or $5. But you gave it, willingly.
I am witnessing a miracle as I see how many small donations are adding up to be something absolutely remarkable. Powerful, really. Don’t ever say that what you have to give isn’t enough. Whether that’s in money or time or energy or whatever. You are enough. And actually, what you have to offer is making the world a better place – it’s changing the world.
You make me want to be a better person. I honestly feel like I’m surrounded by greatness as I witness what you are doing to help this family.
I’ll be doing an update later to share the total of what has been raised for Jared and Lisa!
{If you wish to donate, you can do so on Venmo @MelAndFriendsGive or PayPal [email protected]}
THANK YOU. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
5) Gardening: after begging these amazing Armenian cucumbers off my friends last year, I finally planted them in my garden, and I’ve never been so happy to have a vegetable garden (if you’ve been around a long time, you know that my thoughts about gardening don’t always trend toward the positive – I love the harvest, I hate the actual gardening part, I hope we can still be friends).
Technically Armenian cucumbers are in the muskmelon family not the cucumber family, but you would never know that. The best part is they don’t get bitter. They are so good!
6) Oreo Cake: I just thought I should tell you that I’ve made this show stopping cookies and cream cake from Cake by Courtney four times in the last three months, and it ranks as one of the most delicious cakes in the history of ever.
And I’m not really that much of a cake person. I’d much rather have brownies or some other decadent treat. But this cake has changed all that. It’s incredible. (Two of the times, I’ve used Courtney’s chocolate cake recipe, two of the times I’ve used my favorite recipe – both fantastically delicious.)
That Oreo mousse filling is next level delicious.
7) I Recommend: it wouldn’t be a Friday Thoughts post if I didn’t recommend a game, right? Seriously, we have a game problem. We love them so much.
A reader recommended this brand, new game Finding Sasquatch {aff. link} to us, I promptly bought it from Amazon, and we are loving it. We’ve played it daily since getting it last week. It’s a bit like Clue – just Sasquatch related with a few little twists and turns. So fun! It’s great with two players (but even more fun with a few more).
I also just finished listening to a couple audibooks that I really, really liked {aff. links for books}:
–As You Wish by Cary Elwes (the story of the making of The Princess Bride movie – so entertaining!)
–Lovely War by Julie Berry (an interesting narrative viewpoint – this is a historical romance set during WWI)
–The Songbook of Benny Lament by Amy Harmon (loved this story – audiobook was so well done)
–The Book of Lost Friends by Lisa Wingate (Brian listened to this after I did; we both thoroughly enjoyed it)
–Anxious People by Fredrik Backman (I found this to be so well written and highly entertaining – the circling story kept me guessing!)
Lastly, my friend gave me this prebiotic lotion (I actually have no idea what that means), and it’s the best stuff ever. The smell. The feel. The ingredients. It’s a little spendy so I’m hoarding it a bit, but it’s worth recommending because I think I need it in my life and on my hands forever.
8) Fill in the Blank: my favorite movie right now is __________.
I need some good recommendations, what can I say. We never know what to watch when we *finally* sit down for movie night (either as a family or just me, myself, and I).
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Ok! That’s a wrap.
It’s a long one today. Thanks for being here. Thanks for being my people. Thanks for loving me and supporting me and strengthening me.
It’s weird, I know. I don’t know most of you in real life, but you honestly make my life better. I love your guts.
I have more to share but I’ll wait til next time. Don’t let me forget! (Kitchen table, living room remodel, nail polish, skin cancer update, another update on my unsponsored Hatch alarm clock, and getting your advice on a couple important things). K, byeeee!
217 Comments on “Friday Thoughts”
Hi Mel! I would just like to thank you for doing all of this posting on recipes! Thayer have showed me soooox10 about baking, and taught me so much on how to deal with real life crisis’. Thank you!!!
For help with learning to budget, I highly recommend the book You Need a Budget by Jesse Mecham. My husband and I have tried many times to create and live a budget, but didn’t really have the skills to do it. This book explains HOW to budget, which we really needed. We like the Dave Ramsey program, but this book filled in the “how to budget” that Dave Ramsey’s book really lacks, in my opinion. And he has great ideas for teaching kids to budget when young. It’s an AMAZING feeling to choose where your money is going, instead of wondering where it’s going!
Dementia.
My beloved sister has dementia with Parkinson’s and it has been so hard for our family to lose her sweet presence to this disease. We needed to find a way to connect and keep her with us as long as possible and so I set out to understand the various forms of dementia, how they are alike and different, and I found that there are more ways they are alike than different. Almost all dementia patients got through similar symptoms, although the cause is different. By doing this research we were able to teach our children and grandchildren how to interact with her, how to respond when she can’t form a coherent sentence, how to distract her when she loses contact with reality through delusions or anxiety, how to focus on just one thought at a time for her. We were able to spend a delightful week with her and 32 members of our family and although she won’t remember it, we all will remember forever as she drifts into this void. I would like to recommend a book to anyone who is trying to figure how to help a family going through this. the book is Thoughtful Dementia Care: Understanding the dementia experience by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller. Best wishes to your friends, be sure to care especially for the care giver.
Teens and money – I was a single mom for many years and struggled to make ends meet (my two girls are grown now and have jobs) so there was no such thing as allowance in our house. When they needed a vehicle, their dad paid for one of them and I paid for the other (they were very used vehicles). I paid the insurance but they paid for the gas with earnings from their job.
As far as movies, I haven’t seen any lately. I am re-watching all of my fave show Dr Quinn – I have the entire series on DVD including the movies HEH HEH. The series was aired back in the dark ages of the early 1990’s. 🙂
These Friday Favorite posts are my favorite. PBS has a new series called Creatures Great and Small so fun for all ages. We loved it.
Hi Mel,
First off, that picture of you and your children is beautiful. Magazine worthy really. How blessed you are and how blessed they are to have you and your husband.
That Oreo cake is dreamy.
Regarding teens/allowance, it sounds to me like your system is working just fine. My child is in college, and my system was very similar and still continues on. I don’t believe in a free ride through life nor do I believe on making a child work so hard to pay for everything before they can afford to do it.
I wish I had a piece of that cake!
Teach kids to be proud of their country, and don’t apologize or feel guilty for who they are. Faith, family, and freedom are all precious things we can’t take for granted.
Give yourself a pat on the back. You seem to be doing a great job raising your family on top of all the other things you do. God bless you!
Teens and money and jobs (or lack thereof) is a major stress in our house right now. ugh. Thanks for your thoughts and excellent recipes. Seriously- you’re awesome.
Recommend the movie Black Widow. Whole fam enjoyed it.
Mel, I just wanted to let you know that you’re my favorite food blogger!! My sister-in-law shared your blog with me when I asked for a recipe she had made of yours. Ever since then I’ve made lots of your recipes and shared your blog with friends and family. I’ve even become “famous” for one of your brownie recipes, my neighbor even asked me to make them for her son’s wedding! I always tell people where the recipes come from. Your recipes are easy to make, have real-life ingredients, and are always a home run. Thanks for sharing the love!
Hi Mel,
Thank you. You have helped me manage so many areas of my life with your honesty the past year or two. You have inspired me and helped me to feel like I’m not alone in my thoughts or feelings or actions. You are really an inspired mother. I hope that the rest of your summer goes wonderful.
Love you,
Alicia
Hi Mel, thanks for your great post! Your piece about teenagers and money interested me & I appreciated hearing about what you and your family do. Like you, I had my kids do both the middle school and high school version of Dave Ramsey’s program. I think they learned a lot! I did incentivize completing the course with a bit of money to their savings account when it was completed. I think that helped them get through it in a timely manner 😉
We also require 50% of all incoming money go to savings (and stay there), and a plan for annual giving to a charity of their choice. It’s been really fun to see what they pick each year for non-profits, and they get really engaged in choosing one.
Lastly, we made the random decision that at age 17, they needed to get their own cell phone plan so they had 1 bill to keep track of and be responsible for. If they couldn’t pay it due to the pandemic work loss, we’d help, but it was still in their name and can help them build credit and know the value of the dollar, what happens if you don’t pay on time, etc. The ultimate win we didn’t forecast has been at that age they are the one that eats up all of our high speed data each month!! Eat up your own data!
Hope you have a great week and thanks again for your great recipes and posts. Kristen
We love Miracle Season, a movie about a highschool volleyball team. The new 8 episode series of Mysterious Benedict Society on Disney is really entertaining. Myself and one of my children have read all 3 books and and still like the show too. We also really enjoyed the Great Canadian Baking and I have watched the British version.
A quick comment re: the stresses of the current year (including last year):
I am not a regular commenter, but I do check in every once in a while. I find it helpful to remember that perspective is a wonderful thing. Historically, people have been challenged by far greater trials than we have experienced this past year. I’m thinking of the Plague in the Middle Ages, of the horrors of totalitarian regimes in the 20th century, or even a coworker who’s child is going through leukemia treatments as Covid carries on. We are stronger than we realize. Unfortunately, we get stronger only by stressing the muscles to the point they hurt, then allowing them to regrow. The same is true of our social/psychological strength.
My grandparents went through the Great Depression and WW2. Their parents went through the 1918 Pandemic. Their grandparents (so, 5 generations ago?) went through the Civil War (well, those who were already in the country).
We suffer, rest and get stronger, and suffer more. It is the nature of the world. But we help each other find meaning and do meaningful things, It makes that suffering worthwhile.
Bless you and your family.
Lark Rise to Candleford (4 seasons)
A friend of a friend did this with her high schoolers (maybe middle schoolers too?) and I had wished that I had done this my kids:
She set up checking accounts for her kids specifically so they were responsible for filling out (but not signing) all of those permission slips for school trips, incidentals needed for their sports teams, etc. So the kids were responsible for paying and filling out the forms in a timely manner. Great practice for paying bills on time.
Just saw a new game called Escaping Egypt created by friends. Here is the link if you want to check it out https://www.kickstarter.com/…/escapingegypt/escaping-egypt.
Hi Mel! Like everyone else, I love hearing your perspectives, questions and advice on any and all topics. I’ll add my two cents (haha) about teaching/modeling finances and budgeting to kids. First, I have no strong opinions about methods — whatever works.
However, over the past several years I have become more aware of economic disparities and systemic inequities in every facet of our society. I grew up solidly middle-class with very frugal parents and would consider myself quite frugal as well. However, I’ve come to realize that even being frugal is a privilege — I have time, resources and means to search out deals, access to high quality goods, ways to save, etc. When I ask for a loan, I am not implicitly or explicitly denied because of my name or my appearance. My job allows me flexibility and I have health insurance and sick days if I have a health situation, I can draw from my own savings AND know I could count on family or friends. I could go on, but these privileges based on my race, education, and socio-economic background allow me to be in control of my finances.
By contrast, I work with some amazing students in a job training program who have rarely been financially secure. For instance, it is very common for them to have multiple utilities/cable/loans in their names from other family members (often from when they were kids!) and this REALLY affects their credit score, and thus their ability to rent an apt, get a decent car loan, etc. Although I live in a state with universal healthcare (MA), the reality is that the quality of care and ability to take oneself or a child to a dr. is not easy. Transportation, time off work, caring for other children — many people do not have a support network and what would be a small inconvenience for many can lead to a job loss or catastrophic debt for others. When my students do start to build a rainy day fund, it is often difficult to hold on to it, because they are surrounded by family and friends who are often facing crises, and they tend to share any resources generously.
My point is that part of teaching our kids about self-reliance and finances is to get away from the mentality that we’re “good” or “better” because we budget or live within our means or save, even when we work hard. Instead, I try to remind my kids (who do work hard!) that their access to proper footwear, a beater car (that I pay the insurance on), a phone so they can stay in touch with employers, a decent HS education that set them up for success, not being responsible to care for younger siblings/disabled family members so they CAN work, people who support and care for them, etc., — all those factors and more have enabled them to save plenty of money for college, emergencies. etc.
Hi Mel!
We do basically the same same as you in way of finances with our kids. We do usually negotiate with them how we work out sharing costs of particular expenses, trips, etc. We have them pay for gas but will on occasion fill it up for them.
Yogi Bear is a clean enjoyable family movie that is lighthearted and fun to watch. Mighty Macs (amazon prime) is a great movie as well. (I usually take recommends loosely) but look it up its a good one too!
Thanks for all the good you do!
Recommended movies: ENCHANTED APRIL and THE HUNDRED-FOOT JOURNEY and COLD COMFORT FARM (which you really need to see at least twice to appreciate all the wonderful craziness of it).
Favorite movie: THE PRINCESS BRIDE
Also love CAMELOT and SILVERADO and lots of superhero and science fiction and fantasy series movies (which the above recommended movies are not, by the way, so don’t worry)
Not a movie, but a series. I just finished Mary Berry’s Country House Secrets. Mary Berry cooking in beautiful British estates??!! So fun to watch.
It’s so good to hear from you. Regarding teens and finances is your stake doing the Self Reliance courses? My husband and I did the Personal Finance one a few years ago and felt like so much of the info would benefit older teens and young adults. I think our stake actually had all the priests and laurels take it together at some point. Just a thought.
;0
Have you seen About Time? Sweet, funny, heartwarming, life-affirming. Seriously so good. Vid angel comes in handy because it has a couple naughty words, but seriously such a great movie.
Thank you too for your delicious recipes! My family thanks you too!
I love Mully on Amazon. It is so amazing what one man(family) can do for good. So many wonderful lessons taught.
Thanks, Moriya!
While family loved (& was amazed & kept taking about!) this one!!
If you have not already seen the movie “A Week Away” on Netflix. Like High School Musical but Christian Summer Camp. My boys pretended not to like it but did.
I’d love a post on how your kids sell cookie dough: which recipes, storing, etc. I don’t live in Idaho so won’t encroach on your kids territory.
Haha. My boys have pretended not to like several movies and then they quote them nonstop or ask to watch them again later. I love it. And no worries on the cookie dough business! My son makes four recipes (chocolate chip, fudgy brownie, snickerdoodle and s’mores chocolate chip). He makes a bunch, rolls into balls, freezes, and then pops 12 cookie dough balls into freezer ziploc bags with labels. When people order he takes them out of the freezer and adds a tag on how to bake and sells them that way.
Love all of your recipes that I’ve tried!
Instead of an allowance, we “pay” our kids for good attitudes and willingness to do what mom/dad asks (chores around the house) without having to be asked more than once. We randomly give them $20. They never know when it’s coming so they are very eager to help out…keeps them on their toes. We usually end up giving our 16 year old about $80 a month on average. He also has a part time job lifeguarding so his paychecks get directly deposited into the bank and he uses his “attitude” money for spending money. Works well for us, especially since I went back to work full time this year and the kids have really had to help out around the house! Keeps the nagging away.
What a fun “surprise” allowance system!!
I love all your posts and thoughts and always say, “If its not on Mel’s, it’s not worth making.” So, as always, thank you!!
Just to make you giggle- at first I thought your picture was of your kids holding giant pictures of your cake and pig you know, like how people will add a missing family member to a family picture ♀️
Hahahaha, oh my gosh, that totally made me laugh out loud. Photoshop gone wrong!! Haha.
Always love your Friday thoughts!
Also, Finding Sasquatch game was sold out on amazon, but it’s back in stock (not prime but shipped by seller).
You’re the best Mel! Love that you share not just recipes but let readers get a chance to know you too!
I’m glad it’s back in stock!!
Oooh I love that Oreo cake too, seriously the best recipe I’ve ever found for a cookies & cream type of cake! So worth the effort. But LOL I can’t believe you made it four times! It’s a lot of steps/work!
Movies I added to my watchlist that a friend recommended yesterday: The Father (with Anthony Hopkins), Words on Bathroom Walls (about a teen diagnosed with schizophrenia).
Good job on your garden! I started a vegetable garden this year too for my first year. I’m used to Manteca soil (central CA, very nutrient-rich) where I grew up, and here in San Diego, it’s not the same. So I’ve been using store-bought gardening soil and have been learning how to determine what needs to be added…just added some lime to my bell peppers for calcium deficiency. Seriously learning SO much this year. Also growing tomatoes and zucchini, and various herbs. Hopefully will have a bigger garden next year!
I think I missed some of your recent posts regarding your friend, but I’m glad to hear you’re doing ok, and I’m very sorry for your loss. Hope you can continue your positive mental state going into the next month.
-from a LONGtime follower! (I used to be “The Beachside Baker” way back when I was doing the food blogging thing, and when Google Reader was still a thing. Feels like ages ago!)
Oh wow, you are a very, very worthy and faithful gardener. I am a slacker! But I love that you are getting the soil just right! That was ages ago but I will always remember you!! XOXO
I love all your recipes!
Melanie, have I mentioned lately that I admire you so much. I know it was difficult for you to lose Holli, but I’ve seen you turn right around to give your compassion to others.
Thank you for your kindness and service to our family not just from you but from your family. I can’t believe how you do it, managing your blog, your wonderful family and home, playing the organ every week at church, helping your neighbors, loving those donkeys, chickens and pigs, etc. and doing all the kind things for others you constantly do. And just a side note, thanks for the delicious banana bread. We love you my dear!
Love you, sweet Carol!!
I’ve been following you for a lot of years!! It was like meeting up with a friend each week and finding a new recipe and getting thoughts and ideas on different subjects. You are an amazing person, full of kindness and love. Glad you are able to move forward and are also able to recognize the growth that has come of your struggles. My favorite movie and book is The Book Thief.
Thanks so much, Annie! Ten years ago I listened to The Book Thief every day picking my kids up from school, and I agree: it’s one of my favorites!
Movies (but really TV series):
The Chosen by Angel Studios
All Creatures Great and Small by BBC on Masterpiece Theater
Both beautifully written and produced.
Thanks, Julie!
Good clean movies are the best! There are 2 based on true stories that are centered around college football. One is called Greater and the other is Safety. They are good for the whole family. Clean feel good entertainment.
Thank you!!
I wondered with Jared and Lisa’s story if the Dreamer Foundation could help. I think it will take several resources and donations to make his dream come true. I do not have Instagram but I tried to go to the link on Venmo and could not get anything to come up. My husband’s mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in her late 40’s. It is a terrible disease for any family to go through. I hope his dream comes true. My thoughts and prayers are with them. Thank you for being so open and real. Sometimes it takes someone else’s worries to put my problems in perspective. I just love your honesty and opening your life and heart to others.
Hi Candice – sorry you had issues with Venmo! I believe their family looked into the Dream Foundation but for some reason they weren’t eligible, but I’ll follow up and ask them! Thank you for your thoughts and prayers in their behalf. Appreciate you!
K…..not a movie, but my favorite show ever has come back to TV! It’s called Leverage. They just started a new version (with the same loveable characters) called Leverage: Redemption. It’s a kooky group of former bad guys turned good and pulling cons as modern day Robin Hoods. It’s SO good! You can find all the seasons of both on Amazon Prime TV.
I LOVE this show so much!
I didn’t know there was a reprise! Thanks for that info!
Sounds fun! Thanks for recommending it!
I like your way of dealing with kids and money with the exceptions of…. you pay for phone and car insurance. We don’t do cell phones…. a million reasons, but bullying and pornography being at the top of the list. When our kids are 18 AND ON THEIR OWN they can buy their own phone if they wish, and pay for their own service. Phones are not a necessity. The other thing is car insurance. We have our kids pay for their own drivers education – this helps them be invested. Driving is a privilege, not a right. Then we have them pay for whatever our insurance goes up when we add them as a driver; it’s usually been around $50/month. We have also had our kids buy their own cars. We started this with our oldest, and he did really great, taking care of his own car. The second daughter, we let her use our van, got a little Mazda she dented or wrecked both… so we went back to … buy your own car, and now all 6 of our older kids that are out of the house have done that. We still have 2 left… and they are currently saving up to “buy an old truck” We have them get jobs at 15 or 16 as well and it has turned out great – motivated kids find jobs. Many people say there aren’t jobs for 15 or 16 year olds…. yes there are. It takes creativity and work finding them, and sometimes they aren’t very glamorous jobs, but they are out there!!! I’ll have to look into the Dave Ramzey for teens. Love your blog. Feel like I know you. We used to live in Middleton – on Lansing and Top Road. We were in the 2nd ward I think… we just lived there a few years…. maybe 2006 – 2009. Then we moved to Greenleaf, and now we are in beautiful Grangeville. It’s amazing. Thanks for all your inspiring and delicious recipes and ideas1! Hugs, Carla
Thanks for adding your thoughts, Carla! And love that we have some of the same stomping grounds! Cell phones can be a divisive issue, and I think it’s important for every family to do what works for them. I’m glad you’ve found such a good system for you and your kids! It’s so important to figure out what works. Sounds like you are raising some amazing humans!
Just watched a great movie with my husband the other night, but I know my kids would have loved it to. It’s called The Secret and available on Amazon Prime.
Thanks, Kimberly!
Love your Friday Thoughts posts. I’ve slowly been working my way thru some of the book recommendations you have listed on your Instagram. Supper helpful! Thanks for collecting and sharing those!
My husband and I are into clean and cheesy movies. We love “Take a Chance” with Kirby Heyborne and Corbin Allred in it.
We also enjoy movies directed by Brian Brough. He makes good, clean chick flick types. One of our favorites is An Hour Behind. We are able to watch his movies on Amazon Prime. I hope you enjoy it if you watch them.
Thanks for the recommendations, Alyson!!
We do You Need a Budget (YNAB) with my son. He’s 11. We gave him cash allowance until last year when no one wanted to touch cash. Our credit union lets us set up ‘lunch accounts’, and we could do a card in his name. He can’t overspend on it, it won’t pull money from our account, but he’s learning how to use a debit card now. Bonus – I set up an automatic transfer so I don’t forget to pay him! Plus, he loves seeing his number of dollars go up, so he’s saving more than he did with cash.
Since he’s 11, with no opportunities for extra earnings right now, he doesn’t pay for any necessities – clothes, etc. I’m not sure how we’ll handle teenage years, but I enjoyed reading your system and the comments! We also don’t pay for chores because I want him to learn how to handle money now so he hopefully will make less mistakes later. Which is why we have him use a budget.
Movies: We all enjoyed Raya and the Last Dragon (Disney+). Predictable, but I loved the message. Also enjoyed Home (Netflix), Camp Crustaceous (Jurassic Park cartoon series Netflix) with my kid.
Great plan for your son, Courtney! I love that. And thanks for the show recommendations!
This is u think my first comment. I am sorry for your loss. Losing friends is hard. We lost our granddaughter in march.our daughter was 15 weeks into pregnancy. We were as a family devastated but in our pain we grew closer togethe4. Also your story of you4 friend with Alzheimer’s reached me. My husband was diagnosed 10 years ago but still doesnt think there is anything wrong even though he cannt remember much of anything but we are grateful that he is physically healthy.
I’m so sorry about the loss of your granddaughter, Linda. So very sorry! And I’m sure it has been a challenge and journey with your husband – I’m glad he seems to be doing ok physically so you can have more time with him.
I adore these Friday Thoughts posts, and I adore you, Mel! I’ve been around Mel’s Kitchen Cafe since my kids were young, and now my oldest is 27! I’m a lifelong Mel fan 🙂 I don’t have a lot to add to the conversation, but wanted to say how much I admire you for using your platform for good (like helping your friends). Also, I’m an avid reader (and audiobook listener), so I appreciate your book suggestions. I also give 2 thumbs up to “As You Wish,” “Lovely War,” and “The Book of Lost Friends.” People should definitely listen to the audio versions of these – so good!
Oh Sheree, I’ve loved you for years even though we’ve never met! So grateful you are still here, always love seeing your comments. And now I know we are kindred spirits because of our love for audiobooks. They’re the best!
Mel, you are just the best. Your posts give me pause, they make me cry, make me laugh and overall bring me joy and peace in a crazy whacked out world. So, thank you, thank you for making me want to be better and thank you for being you!!! I wished I could have hung out with you while you were in San Diego! That would have been fun.
Always a fan,
Janette
Janette – thank YOU! Seriously. Thank you for being here. And now I just need to plan another trip to San Diego – right?? 🙂
I just love you more and more with each post. I feel like I have grown this past year too and it is good and hard!
Those mini ice cream cones are amazing and so are the mini ice cream sandwiches.
I loved The Lovely War and have been wanting to read Anxious People and keep forgetting. I will add it to my list.
Again I have to thank you for advocating dermatologist visits. My Dad had melanoma last fall and it was caught and dealt with quickly. I go too for regular check ups and enjoy the peace of mind.
You are such a source for good in our troubled world!!
Thanks, Jennifer! This post got too long, but I wanted to include a suncare/skin cancer/sunscreen section. I’ll have to wait til next time! I have a new basal spot on my face that I’m getting looked at soon and a weird spot on my shoulder. It’s keeping me on my toes! So glad your dad’s melanoma was caught quickly!
My favorite non-Christmas family movies are Remember The Titans (maybe not young children), A Simple Wish, Back to the Future part 1, and great musicals like Sound of Music, My Fair Lady, Greatest Showman, and Newsies.
For teens and adults: 13 going on 30, National Treasure, Dances with Wolves, Dumplin’, and The Blind Side (there is a couple swear words and a tiny bit of inappropriate conversation.) Freedom Writers (uses the F word once and some disturbing scenes. It is a good one to preview then watch it with your teens and discuss it. Based on a true story)
For adults: Bed of Roses, Babycakes, The Notebook, The Lucky One I love Message in a Bottle, however, I hate how it ends.
thanks for all the recommendations, Jamie!
Sorry, way too many topics, and details in one post. I love to read, but this is overwhelming for even several settings for someone does not know you. Therefore, that made it impossible to read or have time to comprehend all you have written.
Your recipes look delicious. Din’t have any time left to check them out for now.
This post was a little wordy! Sorry it was a bit too intense. When I get started, it’s hard to stop. 🙂
But please don’t stop! I love Friday Thoughts!!
Our favorite movie right now is Hidden Figures. Our favorite family game is Wink. My kids like Spaceteam. We’re a family of 11 and absolutely love games!
I’m so sorry about your friend. My best friend of 30 years (we all met in our newlywed Sunday school class at church in 1988), went to Jesus in 2020. Breast cancer. I miss her every day, but so thankful for the hope we have in Christ Jesus that I’ll see her again, for all of eternity worshiping our Savior! She and I have read your blog for years. I remember you posting about your daughter being born. ❤️
Thank you for the recommendations, Cindy! And my goodness, I am so, so sorry about the loss of your best friend (30 years!!). Your reunion in heaven will be so sweet. So much love to you.
Hi Mel,
I’ve thought of you often since the passing of your dear friend Holli. and prayed that you and her family have been comforted by many prayers on your behalf.
My husband & I have a real problem since being introduced to Kdramas with Crash Landing On You! We absolutely LOVED it, and we have only watched Kdramas ever since (remember I told you we had a problem) You can find it on Netflix ! Get ready to love it. It’s 16 episodes and about an hour and half long. ( most Kdramas are 16 episodes)
Let me know what you think. It will only take the first episode to get addicted. Your heart may ache throughout but it’s so worth it !
Hey Linda! I’ve heard so many people recommend the Crash Landing Korean drama. I’m going to have to buckle down and watch it! I just have to plan for it since I can’t multi task (hello, subtitles!).
I got on here tonight to find your comment and thank you for recommending “Crash Landing on You”!!! It’s a show both my husband and I LOVED!! We binged it and lost too much sleep! Such a sweet, clean show with many loveable characters. Now that it’s over, I miss it! I look forward to finding another good Kdrama!
Consider The Map of Tiny Perfect Things and Hunt for the Wilderpeople for your viewing pleasure. And do listen to The Princess Bride as read by Rob Reiner if you can.
I don’t know hardly anyone that has seen Hunt for the Wilderpeople – it is literally one of my favorite movies ever. I love you for including it in your comment.
I love Hunt for the Wilderpeople! My husband and I are always quoting from it!
My favorite go-to movie is Julie & Julia. I have seen it a million times so I watch it when I am cleaning the house (I even put it on once for background noise while driving from AZ to OR). Also, we were super fortunate once to bring home a whole lot of Alaskan halibut and if you get tired of fish tacos (if that’s a thing) then I recommend Emeril’s recipe of halibut patties. It became our favorite way to eat the halibut honestly.
Oh, I am SUPER excited to try that recipe. Thank you!!
Movie Recommendation: The Biggest Little Farm. We rented it for a date night and it filled us with hopes and dreams of what could be on our little acreage.
Went to Amazon to purchase the game you recommended and it said it was out of stock…will keep looking for it. Thanks for all the game recommendations on your blog!
Oh, I loved that show, Katy! It gave me some big, wild dreams, too. (So sorry the game is out of stock!!)
followed for forever—but i love you just as much today as i did the day i started following you!! you are one of the good ones…bless you for blessing us all!!!!xoxoxoxo
That honestly means the world to me, Jeni. You have no idea. THANK YOU!
Some movies that have truly touched my mama heart and always make me want to be a better mom are:
The Prize Winner of Defiance Ohio
Dolly Partons Coat of Many Colors and
Dolly Partons Christmas of Many Colors
Miracles From Heaven
Some clean fun family ones we have watched recently:
Yes Day
Finding Ohana
When the Game Stands Tall
Ramona and Beezus
The Pacifier
O M Goodness I loved YES DAY it was good, and RAMONA & BEEZUS definitely a go!
The Prize Winner of Defiance Ohio was also such a good book, heartbreaking but so good, a testament to the power of one person’s influence!
Thanks, Holly!!
Hi Mel! This is Holli’s Niece, Trevor Pools daughter. I miss Holli so much and it was sad that our family did not go out west that much, but I do know that when I met her she was the strongest woman. With the section Money+Teenagers I know I am only 12 but hey I am the youngest of six. The way my parents to it, is if it’s something you want like a cool hair exceserie then we buy it. But if it is clothes, shoes, school supplies, or gas then you pay for it. But if your child is 17-18 then a lot of the time they have a job and you just pay for gas and the yearly clothes and shoes trip, if they want to get a shirt that they like here and there, they pay for. I don’t really know about the school supplies for that age. In summary just pay for the big things, not the little things. 🙂
I loved reading your comment, Julia! Thank you! Your parents sounds wise and I may take some tips from them!
Hi Mel —
I appreciated all of your post today (and all your recipes always) but in particular your thoughts about internal changes over the last year. A number of years ago, I read a book that said that women frequently come into their own around the age of 40. Less doing what other people want or expect, more doing what you want or think is right. I just tried to find that book again and couldn’t, but did find several articles online that discuss the 40-something shift. It’s a milestone and a stepping stone and a doorway (how many metaphors can I find?:) into an expanded life. Obviously, your experiences of the last year were major also. But anyway, I just wanted to acknowledge you here and acknowledge the strength and introspection and honesty involved.
I was a little late with this shift — it happened around the age of 45 — and that’s been so long ago that I don’t remember any specifics, but I distinctly remember feeling myself as a new self. Enjoy! Revel in it!
Mel you’re a role model in so many ways! I always love your posts and feel inspired. Thanks for being you and making the world brighter!
Thank you so much, Allie!
Hey Margaret, your comment about women coming into their own around 40 really resonates with me. I feel that 40-something shift! And I’m not mad about it, although it has caused a bit of discomfort. I love the depth of your comments. Thank you!
I personally love to show my kids the classics I loved! Princess Bride, Three Amigos, War Games, anything older. It’s a whole different style and it’s fun to comment on the differences in storytelling, fashion, technology, etc.
In our house we rotate every week whose turn it is to pick. So everyone gets a shot and the whole family gets to(has to) be excited for them and support it. Not always my favorite choices but let’s everyone feel like they got to make a “big choice” for the family
Sorry for the struggles you’ve encountered but so proud of you for the growth you’ve experienced and the ability to reflect back with some good feelings in the mix. That is easier said than done!
I agree on the older movies! I need to dig up a few other old favorites.
Books I’ve enjoyed recently: Kitchen Front by Jennifer Ryan, The Book of Lost Names by Kristin Harmel, Killers of the Flower Moon by David Grann (about the history of Osage County indiana, Ok where the Pioneer Woman lives. I think there’s a movie in the works). I’m now reading fluffy cozy mystery series The Library Lovers Mysteries by Jenn McKinlay–a little mystery, a little romance. Kind of like Hallmark movies mysteries.
I love reading your thoughts on family and life in general.
Thank you for the recommendations, Janice!
thanks for sharing! i am excited to read “as you wish” and make an oreo cake!
here’s how we do family dollars: i read “3 steps to a strong family” by richard and linda eyre a long time ago and have basically used its principles. after age 8, my kids have been in charge of buying most everything on their own. i do buy them a new coat and shoes as they grow out of them, and i usually buy school and activity supplies for them. also, birthdays and Christmas and random holidays 😉 allow me to sneak in anything i think they might need. during the schoolyear they earn money buy doing and reporting their weekday responsibilities, and on saturdays they can participate in an extra job auction. in summertime, we work out a “summer deal” of things they want to accomplish/learn/serve that we negotiate a price on (usually what they would need to buy school clothes +). also, as teens they get a summer or year round job to supplement and buy their own gas and phone (i do give them a discounted phone rate, and i do pay their car insurance). i also offer halfsies on things i think important and want to support. i paid half when my teens saved to buy a basic car. i paid half of their apartment rent while in college.
You are seriously the only other parent I’ve heard of that has read the Eyre’s book and set their kids money system up that way, besides my parents! It worked so great for our family growing up and I totally plan on implementing it for my kids 🙂
Thanks for sharing your system, Robyn! It sounds well thought out and super structured!! I like the “halfsies” principle a lot!
Favorite movie? Kate and Leopold probably. 90s, hugh Jackman, family friendly.
My daughter made that cake. I’m not a cake person but holy heck.
Checking out that game.
We do the same with our teens. We’re moving on to where she pays half her gas. They all have some sort of job. My daughter works at the bakery in Kuna. You want to go. My son does lawn mowing, yard stuff. My daughter does dog walking and helps in peoples houses. It works.
I’m listening to the lovely war and loving it. Fredrick backman is one of my favorites. And as you wish was so cute. Have a good one!!
There’s a bakery in Kuna?!?
Thanks, Heather! Busy, busy life!!
Hey! So my kiddos aren’t close to teenagers yet, and we are like you where we don’t really believe in paying our kids for normal, everyday chores But this summer, I made a job board with prices next to each job/activity and we keep a tally of what the kids do. (They want to get a Nintendo Switch and we told them they have to help pay for it). So far, so good, though we are finding that some kids are more motivated than others!
As for movies, we have loved The Mitchells vs the Machines on Netflix… Such a funny family movie and don’t be turned off that it’s a cartoon, totally worth it! My husband and I really liked The Tomorrow War on Amazon, though definitely not a kid movie.
Love your plan for your kids to earn a Nintendo Switch. That’s awesome! And thanks for the movie recommendations!
Hi Mel. My dad died 18 years ago of early onset Alzheimer’s- diagnosed at age 55. It is truly heartbreaking. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to donate to this family and please let them know they are in my prayers.
Thank you for sharing about your dad, Becky. Truly. And thank you for your generosity. My heart goes out to all of you who have shared your experiences with a loved one diagnosed with early onset Alzheimers. So much love to you.
Mel, I love you. Here are some movie recommendations:
For suspense/action but not too scary: 39 Steps (2008 version- I haven’t seen the old ones) or Charade (Audrey Hepburn). Even less intense, but good: Arrival (Amy Adams), U-571.
History: Young Victoria. Decent chick flick vibe without being nauseating or airheady. (I struggle with mind numbing chick flicks. Like give me something I can sink my heart into! Que British dramas.)
British drama: my husband and I just watched the A&E Pride and Prejudice again. So good! But if you’re looking for something new you may not have seen, Cranford is a DELIGHT. Sheer delight I say. Also, Doctor Thorne is WONDERFUL. If you’re looking for a British drama Brian might enjoy also, North and South or The Paradise are both phenomenal. My husband likes the business aspects of both, and the history of North and South.
Have you tried The Chosen? My husband and I do The Chosen on Sunday nights and I love it.
Thanks so much, Annie! The A&E Pride and Prejudice will always be forever my favorite. I love it. I also love North and South and Paradise. But I haven’t watched Cranford or Doctor Thorne, so thank you! (And I completely agree about mindless movies – I like some substance!).
Not a recommendation for a specific movie, per se, but have you heard of VidAngel? It’s a filtering system where you set the parameters of what you might find objectionable in a movie or TV series (anything from swearing to nudity to gore to random things like the word “fart”, etc.). Some of the possible filters make me laugh, but I also remember when my kids were super young and watching Finding Nemo was too much for them. I digress. 😉 Anyway, you set the parameters, which you can update for each specific movie if desired (the app specifies in detail what might be objectionable) and whatever you determine you don’t want to see or hear disappears. If it’s something visual, then that scene is omitted. If it’s swearing, the specific word is silenced although you can still see their mouths moving. Anyway, it’s now a monthly subscription, and for $10/mo. I now feel comfortable watching all sorts of movies included in my Netflix and Prime subscriptions I would not otherwise be watching. You do have to choose the movie or TV series from their app and cast it to your TV, but that’s not a deal breaker for me. We’ve been happy with it.
Hahaha, I laughed out loud at the Finding Nemo comment. So funny. Yes! We have loved VidAngel, but lately, more of the movies my kids want to watch aren’t available there, which is a bummer!
I love your Friday Thoughts. I feel like I’m sitting in your kitchen having a great visit! (Oh, how I would love that in real life!)
You are an amazing person and mother. You bring so much inspiration to all of us. Thanks for being you, and for sharing your ups and downs with us.
Then I have accomplished my greatest desire!! I want these posts to be ones where it just feels like we’re all having a good chat at my kitchen counter. That would be a dream! Thank you, Erica!
I really enjoy your Friday thoughts posts!
Thank you, Catherine!
Love these posts! A new movie we just watched on Netflix is blue miracle, I highly recommend, it’s based on a true story. Those cucumbers looks amazing, I may need to plant them next year! Trev went to Alaska the same time Brian did it sounds like, how fun for your boys.
Thanks for the movie recommendation, Lynsie!! I think Brian got a lot of tips from Trevor – doesn’t he go up there once a year at least?
You are delightful…. After reading your post I feel like I’ve just spent an afternoon with a favorite friend! ❤️
Aileen – that was the sweetest comment ever. Thank you!
Great movies….
Herself
First They Killed My Father
Sweet Tooth (not for very young kids)
The Secret Garden (version with Maggie Smith)
Thanks for your blog!
Thank you!
Love these honest posts of yours. We don’t do allowance – because it’s another thing to think about and quite frankly I can’t keep track of things as it is. But our kids don’t go without. I think of it as the sports, school tuition, dance, music lessons (etc) are the allowance. Keeps it simple. Now they are older and earning money at jobs. I’m crossing my fingers that they’ve learned from our example? haha a course for them on finances would be a great idea too.
Love the simplicity of your plan, Rachel! Totally makes sense!
While I’m glad 2020 is over, I miss my husband working from home. It’s kind of weird when he went back to the office. I’m super grateful he was able to work from home and has a job to go back to. But I miss him. I had to cook more, but at the same time had less laundry. lol
As far as books- Art of Racing in the Rain, Lily and the Octopus, I can’t think of all the ones I’ve gobbled. I mostly do audio books now, since it allows me to do other things(mostly) lol
Movies… I’m pretty boring. I’m more a binge watch sitcoms from the 80s and 90s.
I think San Diego is one of my favorite destinations. I love the zoo and Balboa Park.
I just want to say- of all your recipes- I have no idea why I never embraced your meatball recipes. I’ve been absolutely stuck on the Turkey Skillet with Lemon rice for the last several months, but just tried the teriyaki ones. OMG!!! I need to just print them all off and make a new one each week. I think my mom always complained about making meatballs and so I always had a pre-emptive dislike for making them. I don’t understand!!! lol They are the easiest to make, so many options and ready made portions make it simple to divide up the leftovers for lunches. I even premade the mixture the night before we left on vacation and took it with us (we had a full kitchen because I don’t like eating out all the time, beach towns only have deep fried pub or seafood) and I think it tasted better mixed overnight.
Absolutely love all you share. Wish you all the best. You are so sweet to spearhead your dear friends trip. <3 <3 <3
I’m totally in to audiobooks, too, Andrea! I don’t know the last time I actually read a book. I can multitask with audiobooks and that’s my jam. I’m glad you’ve fallen in love with the meatball recipes! It took me a while, too, because I didn’t realize homemade meatballs were so much better than the frozen ones. Thanks for your comment, friend!
I’m one of the oldies here…I think maybe 12ish years? LOL! I hadn’t thought about how long I’ve been using you as a resource until now.
Anyway…chores chores chores. It’s an endless battle of fairness (and frankly not really caring what’s fair, or what they consider is fair), actually completing them, refusal to remind them to complete them, arguing with myself over if I’m shooting myself in the foot if I remind or don’t remind, making sure that even though my daughter typically did the indoor chores and my son did the outdoor chores, both were taught both chores, and they were allowed to choose which they preferred to do. And no one got out of big projects based on whether they were part of the usual chore plan. If it was time for new mulch, shrubs, etc. we were allll out there working…if it was time to clean and organize closets, spring cleaning windows, baseboards, blinds, etc….we were allll in there working. And they also were responsible (when possible due to said extra-curriculars) for cooking a meal each week. Sometimes that worked out better than others during the busy times and we just rolled with it. But during lockdown I quickly reminded them of all the times they got out of it and they both were cooking a couple times a week! It was glorious! They got very familiar with your blog!!! Selfishly I didn’t allow them to repeat recipes, I wanted them to try making several different things. And I liked the variety. I kept telling them we had Home Economics in our homeschool during lock down. They acted put out, but you could tell they liked it when everyone liked a recipe and got seconds, etc.
As far as allowance, we paid an allowance, more along the lines of what you were saying though, we weren’t paying them for their chores. They were doing those whether they were paid or not, because they live there and it takes all of us to run our house. We always made it clear we can’t make time for all the weekend extra-curriculars if the parents are the only ones doing the household work, if we all pitch in, we all get done sooner and we can all move on to the next thing. They did have jobs, even during the school year, but worked minimal hours due to sports, ROTC, etc. but we thought it was important for them to learn to be responsible towards someone other than us. We got them a car, we were mean and made them share (only 1 grade apart so mostly it wasn’t too much of an inconvenience) but they paid their own insurance. We paid for the gas until we had to get a second car for them, then they were on their own for insurance and gas and we paid the car payment. Now they are both out of high school. She’s about to start her second year in college. She chose to stay home due to COVID and not relishing the idea of just being in a dorm while all classes were online. So we basically pay all of her living expenses. We don’t really pay for much in the way of her clothes anymore (We did help with new things she needed for a new “professional job” in her field) and any hair highlights, nails, entertainment with friends, etc. are at her expense. He will be leaving next month for college 1200 miles away on a full ride navy scholarship, so we won’t be paying for much going forward except plane tickets and he will need to be outfitted with a VERY different wardrobe (from Florida to Maine) but we have been discussing what the allowance situation for him will be going forward. Initially, I was thinking…heck no…BUT…he has worked very hard to secure this scholarship that pays for school, books, housing, meals, etc. and part of his “job” will be to A. Maintain the required GPA B. Navy ROTC will essentially become his part time job and C. during summers he will be on different maneuvers with the Navy and unable to have a regular job. I don’t expect him to completely live off his savings so I assume we will still give him a stipend so he can afford entertain himself occasionally. Anyone who has tips in this area, suggestions are welcome!!
Anyway, all of this to say, of course we heard our fair share of “my friends don’t do chores” or “my friends’ parents pay their insurance” or “my friends don’t do their own laundry”, etc. But I can say that when they move out they know how to do their own laundry, they know how to cook themselves a few very good meals and know where to look for recipes, they know how to clean and do yardwork, and they know how to show up and be responsible for a job. I know our work as parents is never “done” and while we made plenty of mistakes along the way, and our kids are far from perfect, I feel good about the people we are sending out into the world. I guess, no matter how any of us parents chose to shepherd our kids across the finish line, the best we can hope for is good, kind, hard working humans. We all just do our best and then it’s all up to them. I’m sorry that was so long! I guess I needed to get that out!
Thanks for chiming in, Elizabeth! Appreciate it! I’m not sure how we’ll navigate the post-high school world. Sounds complex and ever changing! Your kids also sound amazing, and it’s clear you’ve given them a solid foundation to work from in terms of responsibility and finances. That’s what I care about too: I just want my kids to be good, responsible humans.
My mom passed away five years ago after a seven year struggle with early onset Alzheimer’s. She was 49 when diagnosed with 3 grandchildren also. I’m pretty sure it was the hardest thing any of us will have to go through in this life. I can’t even explain how difficult it was. But…. even though I miss my mom every day, I’ve been blessed with opportunities to learn and grow more like my Savior through all the heartache. My heart truly goes out to that family. It’s something you can’t understand unless you’ve gone through it. Remember God has a plan even if we aren’t able to see it in the moment. Sending love and prayers.
Oh Lauren, I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. I literally cannot even begin to understand or imagine the heartbreak of being on that path with your sweet mom. Thank you for expressing your empathy and thank you for your prayers. Appreciate you.
We do about the same as you for our kids. I have been making my teens pay a portion of their car insurance, but haven’t done that during COVID be size they never go anywhere. We have the pit 50%in savings too. I’ve decided we need to have them set up and track a budget. It’s great that they have the money in their savings acct, but it isn’t helping them budget for things they want to buy……my oldest really struggled with that at college this past year. It also doesn’t help that Rexburg pays so little for hourly work. We live in the east and the hourly minimum is quite a bit higher here. So that is something we are working on. Thanks for all the books selections. I’ve added them to my Audible wish list. Amy Harmon is great. I’ve enjoyed the audio of all of her books. And we will have to try that game. One of our new favs is Cover Your Kingdom. So good…..it’s like Cover Your Assets, but better because you can mess with piles, rearrange or trash. It’s fun! My oldest is headed to Mozambique next week for her HEFY trip she missed out on last year! It’s going to be great! I love your blog I love your words, kindness , and the love you show for others! Thank you for being such a great example of a disciple of Christ!
Thanks for adding your thoughts here, Lisa! I appreciate it! I think the budgeting aspect of teaching teens about money is really important. Thanks for that reminder! And we love Cover Your Kingdom, too! I need to get it out more to play. So excited for your daughter’s HEFY trip – I bet it will be amazing!
Brooke Romney has some great lists of family movies to watch
https://brookeromney.com/category/movies/
Thank you!!
Live that your son was able to go to HEFY with his dad! My daughter is on the same trip ( in Africa) right now. I miss her like crazy, but can’t wait to hear about it.
A great movie I saw recently was the Guernsey literary and potato peel society- haha long title but GREAT movie set in WWII. Great love story as well.
And that Oreo cake looks amazing!!
I would love for one of my kids to go on a HEFY trip to somewhere in Africa. I hope your daughter had an amazing time! I loved that movie, also (and loved the book!).
Just want to say I appreciated your post about being different after this last year and all you dealt with in your life. I walked with my sister who battled terminal cancer for 8 years and boy did my outlook change! I am a born-again believer in Jesus Christ and my faith made me able to walk along side her during some dark times. But I let go of so many little things that bothered me – this or that – and realized each day is a gift so forget the small petty stuff and LIVE! God never promises us an easy life but He is always there to walk with us thru the rain. I love your blog, your candid sharing, wonderful recipes and getting a glimpse into the wonderful person you are! Keep on keeping I and may the Lord strengthen you for what He sets before you one day at a time! Blessings ♥️
What an amazing journey you’ve been on, Kelli. I loved your thoughts. So much.
Two actually. 1 – I made the chicken salad 2 days ago and YES it was the absolute best I ever tasted. I doubled the dressing portion and used what was left from the chicken salad in pasta (elbows) salad. It was awesome ! This pasta salad recipe was my mother’s – the only recipe I ever used for it. Again – this dressing ;amounted to such an improvement I will keep on using it. And sharing it with whomever!!!
Second comment – Mel! You are the most giving person I have the privilege of “knowing.” I was so touched by your response to the death of Holli and wrote then. The family is precious. And now you have laid Jared and Lisa and their precious family on my heart. Thank you so much for that sharing. I will follow up on them and be praying…Thank you Mel, so very much. Jan Nye – been with you a couple of years now.
I’m glad you loved that chicken salad, Jan! And thank you for your kindness. I have felt so pushed to do something to help Jared and Lisa. I couldn’t sleep until I put it into action. So glad you are still here – thanks for sticking around after several years!
There haven’t been many new movies out for awhile, so my family have found a couple shows we like. Forged in fire is one show. It’s a competition between blacksmiths to make a knife (different kind of knife each show) in a certain amount of time. Then they do different things with the knife to see which is best. It’s really fun to watch. We also like to watch Alone. People dropped off in the middle of nowhere and show their survival skills.
As far as kids and teens working, our kids also get full time jobs in the summer when they are 16. We told our kids we will pay for their mission, they pay for their college. So they all have savings accounts to save up for their college expenses. We do help some, like the Christmas during their senior year of high school we get them a really nice laptop for their gift that they can take to college. We have one daughter in college right now. When we drop her off in the fall we do a big grocery shopping trip that we pay for to help her get started for the year and I also send care packages once a month to help out.
Before the kids are 16, they do little jobs they can find like pet sitting,babysitting etc.
For school clothes I made a list years ago of a good number of each article of clothing they should have. Like a certain number of pants etc. Then I go through each child wardrobe before we start school shopping and write down how much they need of what. If they want something after I have bought all the clothes needed than they buy that themselves. That’s how we work that, but like you sometimes things need to be tweaked as time goes on or if something could be done better. I loved reading how you run things with your kids and I’m excited to read what others do as well. I love getting more ideas.
That was long. I love you blog! It’s my favorite food blog:) I live in Boise:)
Oh my goodness, so funny you suggested those two shows! My kids have been obsessed with Forged in Fire and just tonight my 14-year old convinced us to watch Alone (he had watched it at his cousin’s house) – and now they’re super obsessed with that show, too! I love your system with your kids, Jeana! Thanks for sharing!
Love these posts! Thanks for the book recommendations and the cake recipe. Perfect timing as we have a birthday coming up next month! For movies we loved “Peanut butter falcon” and “Jojo rabbit” both were a hit with kids and adults alike. We’re also loving the series on Netflix called “Atypical”. Thanks for all the yummy recipes and entertaining posts over the years.
Thanks for the movie recs, Jina!
Just made a small donation for your friends. Thanks for being you, Mel. Love you!
Oh, Kathryn – thank you!!
Hi Mel-
I always love these posts. I have a kids & money book recommendation: the Opposite of Spoiled by Ron Lieber. I found it tremendously helpful when I started thinking about how to do allowance etc, and it has lots of discussion for every age kid. Maybe you’ve read it?
I haven’t read it – thanks for the recommendation! I’ll look into it for sure!
Longtime reader here! I’m sure it’s in totally different ways, but I also find myself missing elements of 2020 (must obviously put a disclaimer of minus the pandemic and all the hardship it brought to so many). It made me appreciate simple things like nature and the ability to make delicious food.
This past spring, my husband and I sold the condo we’d lived in for 14 years – had not intended to stay that long but were underwater until the sudden market uptick – and now we’re staying with his parents until we figure out what’s next. Life is a little crazy and I miss playing around in my own kitchen, though I’m sure if I decided to make that amazing looking Oreo cake my in-laws wouldn’t complain. 😉
For movies, in the past year I’ve loved “Soul” and “Raya and the Last Dragon”…the latter of which made me sob at the end because it felt like a parallel of the real world in a way. And I must always mention my favorite movie of all time, the 25-year-old film “That Thing You Do”…just a sweet, simple story with fun costumes and music, great one-liners, and Tom Hanks – how can you go wrong?
Wow, sounds like a big life change for you, Molly! Good luck as you navigate this next phase of life. Thanks for the movie recommendations!!
What a wonderful and timely post! Thank you for sharing your heart!
Kids and Money…..Our kids are 16, 14, 11, and 10. We don’t give an allowance. They do their chores in order to eat. “If they WON’T work then they WON’T eat.” However, grandparents give money for birthdays as well as $3 for Valentine’s, Easter, etc. (The $3 tradition began when Grandma found out we’d told our kids it was a Music Truck, just driving thru the neighborhoods during the summer playing music for people to enjoy. Yeah….Grandma decided her poor Grands needed some ice cream money and she uses whatever holiday she can find to send it. Haha!). The kids tithe 10% of their birthday monies.
By age 13, our oldest mowed his aunt’s yard during the summer for mission trip money. Our second oldest planned to babysit at age 13….but the pandemic put a stop to her plans and she hasn’t earned anything.
Meanwhile, our oldest is now 16 and has a part-time job at a locally owned bakery (10 hour days twice a week, with sometimes a third day as needed). He brings home extra goodies that didn’t sell that day. Yum!!!!! He also does a lot of volunteer work: senior citizen gathering mid-week at church, library, and volunteer assistant swim coach.
What does he do with the money? He tithes 10%, pays for his gas, and saves the rest to fund future youth trips and to buy a car. He has few material wants. (His dad and I recently had to stage an intervention and say “Son, you NEED new shoes.”)
What about the other three kids? We pay for everything but within limits. Two girls recently wanted new swim suits “just because”, so they paid for them out of their birthday monies. And the latest $3 from Grandma has gone towards goodies at the neighborhood pool snack shack. Haha! (Mom insists on packing healthy snacks and refuses to give any money towards the junk food.)
Favorite family movies? Well, our taste in movies is rather old-fashioned. A few of my kids’ favorites:
The Third Man
North to Alaska
Chariots of Fire
Twelve Angry Men
Shirley Temple
Incredibles
“Real People” Cinderella
Wow! My comment is almost a blog post! So sorry for being so long!!!
I loved your comment. Thank you!! Love hearing how you manage “the money” thing with kids. Your 16-year old’s bakery job sounds amazing (and I would not be sad about the extra goodies, haha). I’m like you, I don’t fund the gas station junk food stops. It drives me nuts when my kids nickle and dime away their life savings on gatorade and gum. Oh well. Life lessons. There’s fruit leather and almonds in the snack bag if they want them. 🙂
You’re awesome, Mel. Thanks for sharing your light!
I need some donkeys to hide from my kids and life with. I usually try to hide on the top bunk in my boys’ room.
My favorite movie right now is good, old Wild Hearts Can’t Be Broken. I found in on DisneyPlus and it’s brings back a lot of memories from the good old days of my youth 🙂
Hey, the top bunk totally works! I actually may still that idea. haha. Hang in there! And I JUST watched Wild Hearts Can’t Be Broken with CAm – we loved it! And I agree, it totally brought back a lot of nostalgia from watching it as a teenager.
Thanks for all of your thoughts (Friday’s). I appreciate your busy life. My life is also busy, but not like yours with all of your children. I had 6 children, all girls but 5. Now I have 19 grandchildren and 3 great grandchildren. I was a nurse, and worked mostly while my children slept. 22 years in L & D and Newborn nurseries, and then 14 years as a Hospice Nurse. I love to cook, and my daughter got me onto your blog and recipes, which I love. I especially love your chicken fajitas. Oh my YUM!! Can’t use cheese, as I have high levels of mold in my body, but with your fajitas cheese is not needed, as they as so savory and delicious. Thank You! Gayle Halversen
Hi Gayle! Thanks for the comment! What an amazing busy life you’ve led so far! So amazed by what you have accomplished both in nursing and with your kids (and I’ve heard being a grandma is about the best thing ever!).
My current, and maybe always, favorite movie is About Time. It’s a lovely story that includes a bit of time travel, but is really about love and the beautiful relationship between a father and son. I’ve watched it over and over, and love it more each time. It has a wonderful cast, and some great scenery. 10 stars!
Thanks, Jay! I’m excited to watch that movie!
I loved ALL of your thoughts! I feel like I should make the Oreo cake and then reread the post. Although running to Trader Joe’s for mini ice cream cones would be so much faster and not overheat the kitchen. Ha!
I think allowing yourself to be flexible in figuring out the whole money and kids situation is critical. If it is working, then keep it going…adjust as needed. I am a fan of fluid and flexible budgeting…. Having awareness and conversations is key to having it work the way you hope.
Lovely war and anxious people are two of my favorites that I have read/listened to more recently. I would also much rather harvest the garden than tend it. I picked my first blackberries and raspberries of the season this morning. Even with the crazy hot summer we have had here, my berries are bearing fruit! Moments like this…gathering the first fruits of the season…help me to reflect and remember that I have so much to be grateful for…especially for you and all you share with us.
Love you to pieces. xoxoxo
Sounds like we are kindred spirits, Meli. And I agree – go for the mini cones now and make the cake later. 🙂 Thanks for sharing your gratitude moments – I needed the reminder!
HAHAHA Sasquatch is no longer available on amazon….I think you sold them out!
Oh my goodness, I just looked and you’re right! I hope it comes back in stock soon!
Classic favorite movies I’m loving again: The Court Jester (Danny Kaye), That Thing You Do.
Also recent watch from Disney+ “The Finest Hour(s?)”. Based on a true story of one of the most miraculous Coast Guard rescues of all time. Seriously – SO well done and intense but CLEAN. Chris Pine (one of the famous Chris’) is the main character and does an amazing job of being someone other than himself. 🙂
Thanks for the recommendations, Sandy!
My favorite thing to watch right now by far is the TV series “The Chosen”. You can download “The Chosen” app on your phone and watch it for free! It will even castify to your tv. It is a much watch this summer!
Oh my goodness I second this 100 times over. It is such a beautiful show!
Yes! I love “The Chosen!”
Thanks, Leisel! We watched the first couple of episodes a while ago, but we need to get back to watching it!
Love the movies I Can Only Imagine, Amazing Grace and Just Mercy
Thanks, Denise!
My kids worked hard in school, all AP classes and late nights of excess homework. During the two months off in summer I let them sleep late and recharge. They had music lessons, sports camp, and lots of summer reading, but I wanted them to have the summer off knowing they would be working almost all of their adult life after college. Maybe I was wrong in not making them have summer jobs, but all three are now working, married, and have good jobs. I remember my summers as the best time of my childhood and I wanted them to have that too. Childhood is such a short time of life. I think there is no one right way to handle this. Every family is different with different priorities.
Thanks for this Friday update. I hope you have a better second half of the year, with healing and happy family memories. All my best to you and your wonderful family. Family is everything!
Not wrong at all, Teresa! That’s why I love hearing how other families do it. There is a lot of space for all of us. Family situations and kids are so unique. It sounds like you’ve done an incredible job at raising some really good humans. I hope we can do the same!!
I love these posts and this one especially. Thank you for your thoughts and sharing your heart. I feel like this is a very one sided relationship – you give (recipes and wisdom) and I benefit from it. Your words meant so much to me today and I’ve save your thoughts on being enough in my phone and will read them when I’m feeling extra discouraged. Really, I wish I could better express how grateful I am to you for everything you share.
I have no advice on money. Right now we basically have no system. As for movies, a few that I am always willing to watch are Remember the Titans, Enchanted and Emperor’s New Groove. I’ve added your game suggestion to my wish list. I just put together 4 bookshelves to help with our ever expanding game and puzzle collection, so now I have space for new games. (Not that I didn’t buy new games when I didn’t have space. . . . ) Speaking of games, have you tried Quacks of Quedlinburg? We just played it with friends and bought it immediately, it is really fun.
Sorry to go on and on. Thanks again for everything, you really are the best!
Thank you for your heartfelt comment, Jennifer. Seriously. I appreciate that you took the time to comment. My sister loves that game (the quacks one)…looks like I need to geton board!!
Thanks for the response Mel!
Hi! I’m one of those long time readers. Our lives are very similar but I’m a few years ahead of you. We would be friends in real life… My oldests are 24. And my one daughter just graduated from high school. It has caused a legit pain in my heart to have her go! It’s so much fun to have a daughter that has become a genuine friend! I love and adore and truly enjoy my boys too (five boys!) but the relationship with my daughter is different. She is going to HEFY on Wednesday!
You are way more organized than we are with money and chores in general. The kids are crazy ridiculously busy during the school year with sports, music snd school so we don’t ask them to work. Summer is hard for regular jobs as well with all the sports and church camps and family reunions. They pick up side jobs and I hire them to help with our super busy puppy business. (We raise Goldendoodles). Everyone has chores and we work out money with each one individually but there isn’t so much of a standard method for us.
We are trying to eat more of a whole foods plant based diet (health not moral reasons). I don’t care so much about GMO stuff but we need some good tasty recipes that don’t feature meat so send them our way!!
I’m not Mel, but have followed her for years, and also eat a whole foods plant based diet for health reasons. Some of her recipes, with slight tweaks, are among our very favorite dishes. IP Banana Bread Oatmeal (use almond milk), Satay Chicken(less) Noodle Salad (leave out chicken and add a can of chickpeas), Summer Roasted Vegetable Salad (leave off feta or sub a vegan feta; I also add chickpeas and roasted red onion), and prob my very fav: Black Bean and Sweet Potato Burritos, except I serve as a taco filling and leave out the cheese. Then add a plant-based cheese sauce over the tacos. The filling is amazing! There are more (her curry dishes included); these just came to mind. Good luck!
(Thanks for chiming in, Alicia – such good tips!)
It sounds like you have it very well together, Kimberly! Seriously! Running a puppy business is no joke. Our friends do that, and their kids work really hard to help support it. I’m so excited for your daughter to go on HEFY…but sad for you that she’s leaving you for college. RUDE! 🙂 I hope your momma heart manages ok.
I have teenage boys and they mow lawns for work. It’s kind of nice to set their own schedule (they mow about 30 lawns in 3 days), but it makes it a little hard to go out of town for more than about four days. Oh well, it’s good for them to work hard and they love earning money. I’ll have to check out the Dave Ramsey course for teens. Also, I love that you’ve done this for your friends, Jared and Lisa. What a difficult, heartbreaking situation for them. Thank you for doing what you can to help them! We all love your guts too, Mel.
Thank you, Madison! Sure appreciate you. And wow, impressed with your teenagers! That’s awesome they have a thriving lawn mowing business and do so well at it! Love that.
Our oldest is 13, so no real jobs here. The kids get a weekly allowance every Saturday during the summer because they are expected to do more work (chores, piano, learning work, etc) each day than during the school year. They pay for their wants (Barbies, video games, yo yos) and we pay for their needs and family fun. During the school year there are birthdays and Christmas and other gift giving holidays where they can hope for things they want.
Favorite movies: does binge watching The Mentalist count?
Yes, binge watching counts! 🙂 And thanks for chiming in on your family’s plan. I love hearing how other families make this work!
Emma (the new one), could watch it over and over!
I haven’t seen it yet, but I think I need to!
I am feeling some of the same feelings you have been going through with the loss of your friend. My nephew is currently in the ICU after an accidental electrocution on the 4th of July. A total unnecessary accidental that will probably cost him his life. He is only 19 and was getting ready to live with his friends next month and hopefully have a more normal year at college. I don’t understand God’s plan of taking good young people and I hurt so much for my brother, sister in law, and his brother and sister. I am trying to be at peace knowing he gets to go be with his Creator and we are left here having to grieve. I’m having a hard time knowing when I last saw him on the 3rd it would be the last time. Thank you for sharing your feelings in your previous posts and being so honest with your life.
Oh Becky, I am so, so sorry to hear about your nephew. It’s so hard to stand by and feel the hurt for those we love and feel like we can’t do anything to take it away (for them or for us). I’ll be praying for you and for your nephew and his family. Each day is so amazingly precious. Thank you for that reminder.
Thanks Mel. He ended up passing away the following day on July 17. Now we all need to learn how to go on without him. We don’t understand God’s plan but know he is at peace and we are the ones left behind grieving. Life can change in an instant but it reminds us that we need to make the most out of the time we have here. So glad he choose to have a piece of cake when he was at my house for our party on the 3rd.
I just started making fancy cakes this year. I make one a month. I have used Cake by Courtney for every one, but I haven’t made her cookies and cream yet, but I will now. Thanks! Summer is ok. We are blessed to live where we have rain and not too crazy hot right now, but we are humid. Wish I had a garden. I try every year, but we live in the country and dear just eat whatever I plant. I really, really, REALLY wanted zucchini this year and planted a bunch and the dear just ate them all. We love the Marvel movies, so we loved the new Black Widow one and all the marvel series on Disney +. I read a book I LOVED and would highly recommend, it is a graphic novel but a true story. When Stars are Scattered by Victoria Jamieson and Omar Mohamed about boys in a refugee camp. So good! Thanks for being a rock star Mel! Made your chicken salad for dinner last night and it was so good! I have been around here for 10 years or so and just love you! If you ever get to KS, come see me!
Oh man, that sounds like our years in Wisconsin! The deer ate everything (even despite my best attempts at building Fort Knox around my garden). I’m sorry! My kids loved the new Black Widow movie because it had kunekune pigs in it (I didn’t watch it, but they told me after and were so excited, haha). Thanks for the recommendation on the book. Excited to check it out, Jen! I always love seeing your comments.
Have you seen The Art of Racing in the Rain? So good (especially for dog lovers) and good for the whole family. It’s one of those movies that may actually be better than the book. The book is great also, it just has a lot of language I wasn’t fond of.
Speaking of games, have you played Hi-Lo Flip? You recommend lots of games, so I can’t remember, but we love it.
I second The Art of Racing in the Rain! I started the audio book completely oblivious to there being movie and then watched the movie before I finished the book. I’m glad I finished the book because there were several humorous anecdotes that in no way could have been translated to movie (I’m talking about the crow scene). lol I’ll just leave it at that and then you’ll read it and be like.. “gross you weirdo you think that’s funny?!”. But since it’s told from the point of view of the dog- it’s absolutely hilarious.
Haha, now I’m SUPER intrigued, Andrea!!
Thanks, Janet! I haven’t played that game, but now I’m super excited to try it. And you’re the second one I’ve seen that recommends that movie, so it sounds like we need to watch it. Thank you!
I would totally recommend watching The Art of Racing in The Rain
Love your Friday thoughts. I really liked what you said about how you have grown from the challenges and trials you have had and how you have had to fine tune who you really are and who you want to become. I think that is wonderful advice and something we all need to do. If we can focus on gratitude for the blessings we do have and who we want to become we can get through lots of hard things. You think a lot like I do and I love your recipes and your ideas. Thanks for sharing and keep up the good work!! So glad to share some money for your friends’ trip. Hope and pray they can do it while they have time.
Thank you, Roberta!
Thanks for the recommendation, Arie!
Thank you. I needed this today.
XOXO
I always love these posts! I agree hands down to the Oreo cake from cake by Courtney. We’ve made it several times and just made them earlier to is week as cupcakes (filled with the filling duh). So so good!
Oh wow, can’t wait to try that cake as cupcakes!!
We’re watching a bunch of d movies as a family these days – The old Pink Panther movies, The Great Race, etc.
As my kids are getting older, the summer gets harder for me. When they were little we did every adventure together as a family. As they get older, they have lots of individual adventures so it’s harder to make time for full family adventures. I’m still figuring it out. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with all of us!
I agree with you, Christie! I feel divided in the summers (and actually all the time) as my kids get older and we don’t do as much as a family like we used to because they are with their friends more.
Love your Friday thoughts! One of my favorite under-the-radar movies is Dan in Real Life. Poignant and hilarious.
Thank you, Laurie! I’m excited to watch it.
Fellow introvert here, and I too enjoyed 2020 more than 2021. I was able to spend precious time with the fledglings before they flew the coop. I may have to try those Trader Joe’s ice cream cones, but without the farm animals, haha!
Haha, they’re good with or without farm animals in the background! 🙂
Movies…Doctor Thorne (Charles Dickens meets Jane Austen type movie), Matchbreaker (for a fun light-hearted and silly romance), Captain Courageous (old black and white movie—SO good. Great for boys), and Front of the Class (great insights into your eyes syndrome and what determination and optimism can do).
Can’t wait to make that cake!
Oh my gosh, Cake by Courtney’s oreo cake is so divine! I made it recently into cupcakes for a coworker’s retirement party and even made the mousse filling to fill them. They were an absolute hit. I’ll have to try your chocolate cake recipe the next time I make it.
My mom recently recommended “Wish Dragon” on Netflix. We haven’t watched it yet, but it’s in our queue. We also recently watched and enjoyed “The Dig,” also on Netflix and “Wild Mountain Thyme” on Hulu (well I enjoyed it, my husband kinda thought it was meh).
Mel – I think it’s time for a Billings reunion!! Loved reading your catch! By the way I have the same shirt as you in the plane picture! Movies – I have rave about this one because it was a good find – Blue Miracle on Netflix – good fishing movie and family friendly based on a true story and I just heard good things about “Greater” also on netflix.
Storm Boy was cute. Love you Mel. Thanks for enriching my life.
Wow Wow Wow!!! Wonderful “thoughts” post.
It was heartbreaking but wonderful to hear about your epiphanies and such. I hate the challenge but wow- to know yourself?? That is very much not me. I’m glad you feel more comfort there. —- What a sad and difficult time for your friends. AGAIN!! You are an emotional rock for these people. I come here for the recipes- and then to hear you speak so lovingly and wonderfully about all this stuff in your life…. THANK you for opening up and being a real person behind these yummy recipes!!—— The money thing- We are like you in that we do not tie allowance into chores. Our daughter (just turned 13) has been getting an allowance since I think she was 4. It wasn’t much to begin with, and then somewhere along the way it seemed to turn out, that she gets her age per month. She has several chores to do- and has been doing a chore since she was 2 (putting up silverware). Each year we have added a chore here and there- emptying trash, cat litter, folding towels and napkins, etc…. it is unusual but our daughter really doesn’t ask for things very often. However lately she uses up most of her available fun money for books. We pay for all the normal things. But in the past she has bought a stapler (haha), some legos, and recently some nailpolish. We have always coached her about saving/spending. Hopefully it sinks in. When she starts high school next year we will open a savings account and talk more about budgeting. During the pandemic and us staying home it was pointless for me to always have to go to the bank for her $12 allowance. So I turned to the app called ROOSTER MONEY. It’s been great for me to see how much she has in this virtual bank. When it comes time to spend something, I can just subtract it from the tally of what I owe her. I’ve really enjoyed the app and it can do more than what I use it for. I tried to let her utilize some of the features, but they just haven’t been necessary yet. It also lets you use it for paying for chores, but ours is a flat rate as I said. Some months she ends up doing more/less chores depending on other factors and we don’t add to or dock her pay because of it. She has the ability to earn “extra” money if she wants to do something out of the ordinary. But she hasn’t been motivated by money or things enough to want to do that very much.——– Man a longwinded comment. I leave with a big THANK YOU. You’re awesome. and your family is super lucky for you.
Hello “old” friend -nice catching up with you and your family! Because of your book recommendations, I will be making my first trip to our library in 18 months – thanks for the inspiration! Oh, and I’ll be stopping at the grocery store to pick up oreos on the way home 🙂 Enjoy the rest of the summer – hope the temps cool down (if it’s any consolation, it’s incredibly hot and humid in NJ also so I feel ya)
Take care!
Good morning, Mel! Thanks for the awesome post. I don’t know much about new movies but I tend to re-watch my favorites like Hidden Figures and National Geographic documentaries. Hmmm, I think I need to keep an eye on everyone’s suggestions. Thank you for all of the good you do and put out in the world. Big hugs!
Thank you Mel for your post. Makes me smile, cry and love your honesty. To fill in your blank of movies… “Finding ‘Ohana” is good. It’s on Netflix and the today version of Goonies. Some favorite movie is Sliding Doors or Love Actually or the holiday (rom coms). Movies with my huby he likes to watch are any marvel movie or fun oldies like the mighty duck series since the kids can watch with us.
Thanks for the recommendations, Lana!
Jenna, I love the Hidden Figures movie, too!